Editor's note: Objchina, our blogger from Nigeria, shares his top 9 things that foreigners should avoid doing in China while interacting with the Chinese in order to save them from "certain embarrassment and possibly even outright humiliation." What do you think about the list? Welome to join us for discussions。
編者按:來自尼日利亞的《中國日報》論壇博主Objchina與我們分享了9件外國人在中國不要做的事。在和中國人交往時,不要讓中國人丟面子,不要開過激的玩笑。你是否有同樣的看法?那就加入我們的討論吧。
1. Never get upset in public
不要在公共場合發(fā)脾氣
Public displays of anger are frowned upon by the Chinese and are most uncomfortable for them to deal with — especially if the people getting angry are foreign tourists, for example. This goes right along with making someone (usually the Chinese host) lose face, which you should avoid at all costs. The Chinese place a premium on group harmony, so foreigners should try to swallow hard, be polite, and cope privately。
在公共場合發(fā)脾氣會招來中國人的不滿,而且中國人不善于處理這種情況,尤其是在公共場合發(fā)脾氣還是外國人。這會讓其他人(通常是你的中國朋友)感到丟臉。因此,你要盡力避免在公共場合大吼大叫發(fā)脾氣。中國人崇尚群體和諧,因此外國人應(yīng)該要低調(diào),要禮貌,要私下處理爭端。
2. Never accept a compliment graciously
不要理所應(yīng)當(dāng)?shù)亟邮鼙頁P(yáng)
You may find yourself at a loss for words when you compliment a Chinese host on a wonderful meal, and you get in response, "No, no,the food was really horrible." They expect you to say works like " mama huhu(馬馬虎虎)" or " Na li, Na li哪里哪里" whenever they tell you words like, "your Chinese is very good" while some will say, "your Chinese is very guda" (No, disrespect but just keeping it real)。
These people aren't being nasty...just humble and polite. A little less boasting and fewer self-congratulatory remarks go a long waytowards scoring cultural sensitivity points with the Chinese。
當(dāng)你贊美中國朋友廚藝精湛時,在聽到中國人的回答“不,不,我做的飯挺難吃”時,一定感到困惑。中國人對你說“你的中文很guda(這樣說沒有任何的鄙視之意,只是保持中國人真正的發(fā)音而已)”,他們希望你的回答是“mama huhu(馬馬虎虎)或者Na li, Na li(哪里哪里)”。
他們并不是難相處,而只是過分謙虛而已。少一點(diǎn)自夸自擂能讓你與中國人保持更長久的關(guān)系。
3. Never address people by their first names first
不要一開始就用中國人的名叫他們
Chinese people have first and last names like everyone else. However, in China, the last name always comes first. The family (and thecollective in general) always takes precedence over the individual. For example, my Chinese name is L? Míng, assuming I am a Chinese, you can safely refer to me as Mr. L? (not Mr. Míng)。
Unlike people in the West, the Chinese don't feel very comfortable calling each other by their first names. Only family members and a few close friends ever refer to the man above, for example, as simply "Míng." They may, however, add the prefix lao (lao; old) or xiao(xiao; young) before the family name to show familiarity and closeness. Lao L? (Old L?)。
像其他人一樣,中國人的姓名包括姓和名。然而,中國人通常使用名。例如,假如我是中國人,中文名叫李明。保險起見,你可以叫我李先生(而不是李明)。
不像西方國家的人,中國人不習(xí)慣別人叫他們的姓。只有家人和關(guān)系非常鐵的朋友才會只叫名,例如,“明”。然而,有時候中國人會在名前面加上修飾詞老(老代表年長的意思)或小(小代表年輕的意思)來顯示關(guān)系親近。老李?(很老的李先生?)
4. Never make someone lose face
別讓中國人丟面子
The worst thing you can possibly do to Chinese acquaintances is publicly humiliate or otherwise embarrass them. Doing so makes them lose face. Don't point out a mistake in front of others or yell at someone。
The good news is that you can actually help someone gain face by complimenting them and giving credit where credit is due. Do this whenever the opportunity arises. Your graciousness is much appreciated. For example, "Give a round of applause for Laoshi, for giving us a wonderful lesson today," THEY LOVE THAT。
對于你的中國朋友,你最不該做的事就是在公共場合羞辱他們或者讓他們感到尷尬,這樣會讓你的中國朋友丟面子。不要在其他人面前指出你朋友的錯誤,或者對你的朋友大吼大叫。
好消息是你可以通過自己的實際行動幫助朋友挽回面子。你的贊美之言,你的誠信意識都可以給你的朋友臉上增光。例如,“用熱烈的掌聲感謝老師今天給我們上了一節(jié)精彩的課”。中國人喜歡掌聲。
5. Never let someone else pay the bill without fighting for it
不要靜待他人買單
In the past, I was stunned the first time I witnessed the many fairly chaotic, noisy scenes at the end of a Chinese restaurant meal. The time to pay the bill has come and everyone is simply doing what they're expected to do — fight to be the one to pay it. The Chinese consider it good manners to vociferously and strenuously attempt to wrest the bill out of the very hands of whoever happens to have it. This may go on, back and forth, for a good few minutes, until someone "wins" and pays the bill. The gesture of being eager and willing to pay is always appreciated。
以前,當(dāng)我第一次看到中國飯館喧鬧嘈雜的場面時,我驚呆了。買單時,每個人互相推攘,爭相買單。中國人認(rèn)為爭著買單是一種優(yōu)秀的行為。這個過程會持續(xù)幾分鐘,直到有人勝出付賬。爭著買單會得到他人的欣賞。
6. Never show up empty handed
不要空手串門
Gifts are exchanged frequently between the Chinese, and not just on special occasions. If you have dinner in someone's house to meet a prospective business partner or for any other pre-arranged meeting, both parties commonly exchange gifts as small tokens of friendship and good will. Westerners are often surprised at the number of gifts the Chinese hosts give. The general rule of thumb is to bring many little (gender non-specific) gifts when you travel to China. You never know when you'll meet someone who wants to present you with a special memento, so you should arrive with your own as well。
中國人經(jīng)常互送禮物,不僅僅是在特別的場合。如果你要去中國人家里去見未來的商業(yè)伙伴或者去參加會議,雙方通常會交換象征著友誼長存和美好祝愿的禮物。西方人在看到中國人送的禮物數(shù)量時都會驚呆的。當(dāng)你到中國旅游時,一般的經(jīng)驗是帶點(diǎn)兒小(不限性別)禮物。你不知道你將見到誰,不知道他是否會送你特別的禮物。所以,你去拜訪他時也要帶上禮物。
7. Never take the first "No, thank you" seriously
不要把中國人的第一次說的“不,謝謝”當(dāng)真
Chinese people automatically refuse food or drinks several times — even if they really feel hungry or thirsty. Never take the first "No, thank you" literally. Even if they say it once or twice, offer it again. A good guest is supposed to refuse at least once, but a good host is also supposed to make the offer at least twice。
中國人即使真的很餓或者很渴,他們也會習(xí)慣性地拒絕別人的食物或者飲料好多次。永遠(yuǎn)不要把中國人第一次說的“不,謝謝”當(dāng)真。一個有禮貌的客人至少要拒絕一次。但是一個好的主人應(yīng)該至少詢問客人兩次。
8. Never accept food, drinks, or gifts without first refusing a few times
不要立刻接受別人給的食物、飲料或禮物
No self-respecting guests immediately accept whatever may be offered to them in someone's home. No matter how much they may beeager to accept the food, drink, or gift, proper Chinese etiquette prevents them from doing anything that makes them appear greedy or eager to receive it, so be sure to politely refuse a couple of times。
在別人家里,任何一個有自尊心的客人都不會立刻接受主人給的禮物。無論多么想要食物、飲料或者禮物,通常中國人的教養(yǎng)會讓他們避免去做那些讓他們看起來十分貪婪的事。因此,推讓幾次會被看作是有禮貌。
9. Never drink alcohol without first offering a toast
不要在祝酒前喝酒
Chinese banquets include eight to ten courses of food and plenty of alcohol. Sometimes you drink rice wine, and sometimes you drink industrial strength Máo Tái, known to put a foreigner or two under the table in no time. One way to slow the drinking is to observe Chinese etiquette by always offering a toast to the host or someone else at the table before taking a sip yourself. This not only prevents you from drinking too much too quickly, but also shows your gratitude toward the host and your regard for the other guests. If someone toasts you with a "gan bei!" you should accept it in a polite way。
"Gan bei" means "bottoms up, or drink all," and you may be expected to drink the whole drink rather quickly. Don't worry. You can always take just a little sip instead。
中國人的宴會會上8至10道菜,隨后會上許多酒。有時你喝的是米酒,有時喝的是著名的茅臺。茅臺酒勁大,外國人很快就會喝醉。一個減緩喝醉的方法就是觀察學(xué)習(xí)中國人的酒桌禮儀。中國人通常會向主人祝酒,而酒桌上的其他人只會啜飲一下。這不僅會放慢你喝酒的速度,也能顯示你對主人以及酒桌上其他人的尊重。如果有人和你干杯,你應(yīng)該起身與他干杯。
“干杯”指的是“喝完或者一飲而盡”。你應(yīng)該一口氣喝完杯子里所有的酒。別擔(dān)心。通常情況下,你只需小口啜飲一下就行。