Life is stressful, and complaining may be considered by many as an extension of being absolutely normal. However, complaining affects our brains and our physical health negatively. A sense of sadness or melancholy is increased, along with real dissatisfaction with our daily lives。
生活充滿了壓力。抱怨很多時候都看成是情理之中的一種發(fā)泄。然而,抱怨也會對大腦和身體健康產(chǎn)生負面的影響。悲傷憂郁的情緒一旦爆發(fā),我們就會對日常生活充滿了不滿。
Negative stress can also exacerbate chronic health problems, such as diabetes or asthma. Other physical complaints may include increased headaches, joint pain, and depression. One way to combat these symptoms is through learning how to stop useless complaining。
消極壓力還會加重如糖尿病、哮喘等慢性疾病。其他的危害還包括加重頭痛,關(guān)節(jié)疼痛和抑郁。想減緩這些病癥的有效方式就是學(xué)習(xí)如何停止毫無意義的抱怨。
1. Nourish A Positive Attitude
培養(yǎng)積極的態(tài)度
Change the way you think. Of course, this is far easier said than done, but it is quite possible. Cultivate a positive spin on how you perceive the problem. For example, it is easy to stress over having the perfect child, job, or date. Accept that life is just plain messy. No one and no situation is or can be ‘perfect.’
改變思維模式。當(dāng)然這個做起來沒有說的那么容易,但也是可行的。在面對困難時培養(yǎng)一種積極的處事態(tài)度。比如,備孕,找工作或約會時,我們都希望達到完美,壓力自然也就產(chǎn)生。不如這樣去想,人生不如意十有八九,沒有什么人或事可以做到“完美”。
Accept the situation for what it is and move forward. Keep the pro side heavily weighed against the negatives. When you inevitably experience set-backs, move forward and remember that everyone has them。
接受現(xiàn)狀再繼續(xù)向前進。多看看積極的那一面,少看消極的部分。當(dāng)遭遇無可避免的挫折時,迅速爬起來然后記住每個人都會遇到。
2. Learn To Adapt
學(xué)會適應(yīng)
The only sure thing about life is that nothing stays the same. Change is coming whether it’s tomorrow, next month, or next year. Some life changes are significantly sad. Allow a period of grieving. Sometimes, setting a daily time to be sad about the change can help。
生活唯一不變的真理就是變化。變化可以發(fā)生在明天,下個月或者明年。很多人生的變化真的會非常殘酷難受。允許自己悲傷一陣子。有時不妨每天空出時間來感傷一下變化。
Acceptance of a situation helps you to adapt positively to life’s changes. Take up the challenge of seeing the positive in a situation, even if it is a small good. Think of the experience as an opportunity rather than an untenable obstacle。
接受現(xiàn)實能幫你積極的適應(yīng)生活中的變動。接受挑戰(zhàn),看待事情積極的一方面,哪怕是很小的一部分。把這個經(jīng)歷當(dāng)成是一次機會,而非是無法逾越的阻礙。
3. Be More Mindful
更加專注
The past can never be changed and worry about the future is futile; complaining about either is a pointless exercise. Rather, move in the present time and cope only with the present situation as it unfolds. Recognize negative thoughts and replace them with a positive spin. Rather than, “Oh, not the alarm again” think of all that can be accomplished in a bright, new day。
過去無法改變,未來遙不可及。對這兩者抱怨都只能是無用功。不如活在當(dāng)下,緊緊抓住現(xiàn)有的時光。找出消極的想法把他們貼上積極的標(biāo)簽。又或是從很小的地方開始做起,換一種積極的新方式,比如“啊,明天不要再賴床“了哦。
While it may sound cliché, learn to graciously accept all that life has to offer–the good and the bad. Even bad circumstances will change, and can teach you more mindful attitudes, such as patience。
這聽起來有點老生常談,但還是要學(xué)著去接受生活帶給你的一切-無論好壞。即使最糟糕的情況也會發(fā)生改變,也能教會你更多有意義的態(tài)度:比如耐心。
4. Be Assertive
要自信
Giving up the bad habit of complaining does not mean allowing yourself to become someone else’s doormat. Assertiveness is the way to tell others what your needs are and how these can be met. Convey confidence through something as simple as posture. Stand up straight, have a firm handshake, and always look people in the eye。
改掉抱怨的壞習(xí)慣不是說要讓你自己成為別人的受氣包。自信就是告訴別人你需要什么,如何才能得到滿足。用簡單的姿勢就能傳達這份自信。站直,有力的握手,跟別人眼神交流。
Enunciate and speak clearly, you want people to understand your point. Avoid rambling, which may lead to awkward and unproductive pauses. Be firm and express what you want clearly. Don’t leave your meaning to guess work。
明確清晰的發(fā)言,因為你想要別人理解你說的話。避免閑聊,以防會有尷尬的浪費時間的停頓。堅定清楚的表達你想要什么。不要讓別人去猜測。
5. Be Less Judgmental
少點挑剔
This includes yourself. Everyone makes mistakes and being critical leads to complaining. Should of, would of, and could of are phrases that’s better left out of your vocabulary. Let go of control. It is simply impossible to be in control of every situation, sometimes it is best to lower the stress and simply roll with the consequences。
這也包括對你自己。每個人都會犯錯挑剔招致抱怨。也許,大概和可能最好從你的詞匯表中抹去。放手吧。想去控制每件事真的不可能,有時候最好的辦法就是減少壓力,接受結(jié)果。
List your strengths to build confidence and, on a better day, list your weaknesses and how to downplay them. Compliment yourself and others. Acknowledge a job well done, or a nicely fitting suit or dress。
把自己的優(yōu)勢列出來增加信心,或者更好的是列出自己的缺點看看如何改進。贊美自己和別人。無論是工作圓滿完成還是穿了合身的衣服裙子。
6. Be Responsible
多點責(zé)任感
Own your mistakes, but never the mistakes of others. The first step to being responsible is self-respect. Begin by thinking highly of yourself and your decision-making process. There is no reason not to. Keep people in your life who respect you, and fail miserably at taking advantage of you。
承認自己的錯誤,但不要把錯誤推到別人身上。第一步就是要學(xué)會自重。要看得起自己,以及整個決定的過程。你找不到理由不這么做。留住那些尊重你的人,撇開那些只想利用你的。
Eject chronic complainers. Let them carry their complaints elsewhere. Through garnering people in your life that like and respect you, you will naturally reciprocate the respect。
驅(qū)逐那些只知道抱怨的人們。讓他們帶著自己的抱怨走吧。只有讓那些你喜歡和尊重你的人圍繞在身邊,你才會自然而然的對自己也重視起來。
7. Keep Moving Forward
保持進步
Absolutely refuse to allow life’s obstacles to keep you from moving onward. Sure, there are people and situations that will annoy you. This is no excuse to dwell on the negativity. Remember, “this too shall pass。” The thing that is creating a problem cannot last forever。
完全排斥生活中的阻礙就是阻止自己進步?隙〞凶屇銦┬牡娜嘶蚴虑椤5矝]有理由一直墮落消極下去。記住“這些都會過去的”。那個制造麻煩的事不會永遠存在下去。
Most problems are temporary and fleeting. Understanding this is the key to moving forward. Take note of self-doubt and then release these thoughts. Spending time in self-doubt is ultimately a waste. Make your decision and follow through。
大部分的問題都只是暫時的一晃就過去了。明白這一點是進步的關(guān)鍵。把那些對自我感到懷疑的地方都寫下來,釋放這些想法;〞r間去自我懷疑真的是純粹的浪費。做好自己的決定然后大膽前行吧。